Yesterday my son's soccer match had elements of a tie, a win, a loss and a lot of learning - especially by some of the parents who were spectators. Last spring in our community two very competitive soccer teams merged when one team's league folded. The coach of that team was picked up by the club my son had played for during the past several years. The "new" coach was put in charge of selecting what would become the "A" team for the club in my son's age division (14 to 15 year old boys). Since the boys from the folded club were much more well known to the new coach, many former "A" team members (my son included) were not selected for the new merged team, but were bumped to the "B" team. Also, several good players left the club for a different rival simply because of dissatisfaction with the merger.
It turns out that both the "A" and "B" team were considered to be on a par with each other as far as the State standings were concerned, and were placed in the same state league bracket. Yesterday was their first league game against each other.
In many ways the two teams are collegial - they are both in the same Club organization, they both include players from the former merged teams as well as other new-comers, and the parents of the players on both teams know each other and we do our best to be cordial even though there may be lingering resentments about who made the "A" squad versus the "B" squad.
The opinion of most of the "A" team parents is that their sons were going to "blow out" the "B" team and prove to the State league that they should have been placed in a higher competitive bracket in the league. The opinion of most of the "B" team parents is that their sons were equal to the "A" team in skill, although admittedly somewhat slower and smaller in overall player size and athleticism. The players themselves seemed to just want to play as hard and as well as possible - as they do for all games. They don't seem to be as "political" as the parents.
So, how did things turn out? The score was tied at zero to zero at half time. The teams had played quite evenly and no team dominated that first half. The "B" team parents felt that this was a definite win. The "A" team parents were stunned to learn that there was much less difference between these teams than expected. The players for both teams were frustrated, as ties are never viewed as wins from a player perspective.
In the second half (these are 40 minute non-stop halves at this age level), the edge went to the "A" team with their slightly better athleticism and with several minutes to go they finally put a ball into the goal after giving the "B" team goal keeper a major challenge. While the "B" team bounced back with an enthusiastic attempt to score in the remaining minutes, it was a hot (95 degree), sunny day and they were clearly tiring more than the "A" team. The final score - 1 to Zero for the "A" team.
Interestingly the "A" team players did not celebrate this win - they had let down their parents who expected a huge scoring difference. The "B" team players also did not celebrate, but they knew they had played hard and that they needed to improve their strength, speed and endurance. However, I think the parents learned the most from that game. And perhaps there will be less of those lingering doubts and resentments now that the parents of both teams have seen the terrific potential of all the players and the near-equals that these two teams are.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Wulfenite
Our household includes three orange tabby cats. Wulfenite is going on three years old, has medium length fur, is overweight and underactive. He is a confused cat, rarely having the instincts of a cat, often chasing (or hiding from ) shadows.
I believe his confused state of mind occurred when he was about five months old (although perhaps he was on the verge of confusion before this event). Wulfenite and his brother Teaky were rescued by our family from a household of non-cat lovers. They were dog people, but not cat and dog people, they just happened to tolerate a cat - Wulfenite's and Teaky's mother. So, the batch of kittens had been confined to an upstairs bedroom and a small cat-apartment. There had been no encouragement to go out to explore the rest of that house and little interaction with most of the people in the house. When we took the two cats, the former owners were both happy to have the kittens off their hands, but reluctant to give us wulfenite - it was clear to them that something might be wrong with him (in his psychological development). However, we always get cats in pairs and didn't want Teaky to be lonely, so we took the pair of them.
Teaky took good care of his brother. Wulfenite didn't speak (or meow), and mostly hid. But, Teaky spoke up for the both of them. The two kittens were both a little shy of exploring and even Teaky didn't see our entire house for about a week - even though we gave them free-reign. Wulfenite was even more timid of exploring than Teaky, but also managed to wander enough to find every closet or piece of furniture that he might be able to hide in.
One May evening, a couple of months after we got these two cats, the front door to our house must not have been closed tightly or locked before we all went to bed for the night. At this point, Wulfenite and Teaky had ventured out into the backyard - under our watchful eyes - a few times, but had never been out at night and had never been in the front yard. During a wind-storm, the front door must have blown open during the night and the cats must have gone out. Randy found the front door open and both cats gone at about 5 in the morning. Later, we found Wulfenite hiding in a closet, but extremely skittish and agitated - more so than before. We never saw Teaky again. We think Wulfenite knows what happened to Teaky, but he's not telling.
Ever since then, without Teaky to take care of him Wulfenite has become even more un-cat-like. He doesn't hunt, he doesn't like meat or other cat treats, he does like styrofoam packing peanuts, but I don't think they are good for his digestion. Wulfenite runs and hides often, even from the other members of the household - he doesn't just hide from strangers as many cats do. Wulfenite did once chase a rat in the backyard, but that was about a year ago - I think maybe some cat-like instinct must have kicked in for a moment. Also, Wulfenite does occasionally speak now - not like a cat, but he sort of makes a squeaking, croaking sound, so I think he has learned to make himself heard since he no longer has Teaky to meow for him. Sometimes, for very brief moments, Wulfenite has even been known to play with our other two cats. I'll have to write about them sometime - because that is a whole different story.
I believe his confused state of mind occurred when he was about five months old (although perhaps he was on the verge of confusion before this event). Wulfenite and his brother Teaky were rescued by our family from a household of non-cat lovers. They were dog people, but not cat and dog people, they just happened to tolerate a cat - Wulfenite's and Teaky's mother. So, the batch of kittens had been confined to an upstairs bedroom and a small cat-apartment. There had been no encouragement to go out to explore the rest of that house and little interaction with most of the people in the house. When we took the two cats, the former owners were both happy to have the kittens off their hands, but reluctant to give us wulfenite - it was clear to them that something might be wrong with him (in his psychological development). However, we always get cats in pairs and didn't want Teaky to be lonely, so we took the pair of them.
Teaky took good care of his brother. Wulfenite didn't speak (or meow), and mostly hid. But, Teaky spoke up for the both of them. The two kittens were both a little shy of exploring and even Teaky didn't see our entire house for about a week - even though we gave them free-reign. Wulfenite was even more timid of exploring than Teaky, but also managed to wander enough to find every closet or piece of furniture that he might be able to hide in.
One May evening, a couple of months after we got these two cats, the front door to our house must not have been closed tightly or locked before we all went to bed for the night. At this point, Wulfenite and Teaky had ventured out into the backyard - under our watchful eyes - a few times, but had never been out at night and had never been in the front yard. During a wind-storm, the front door must have blown open during the night and the cats must have gone out. Randy found the front door open and both cats gone at about 5 in the morning. Later, we found Wulfenite hiding in a closet, but extremely skittish and agitated - more so than before. We never saw Teaky again. We think Wulfenite knows what happened to Teaky, but he's not telling.
Ever since then, without Teaky to take care of him Wulfenite has become even more un-cat-like. He doesn't hunt, he doesn't like meat or other cat treats, he does like styrofoam packing peanuts, but I don't think they are good for his digestion. Wulfenite runs and hides often, even from the other members of the household - he doesn't just hide from strangers as many cats do. Wulfenite did once chase a rat in the backyard, but that was about a year ago - I think maybe some cat-like instinct must have kicked in for a moment. Also, Wulfenite does occasionally speak now - not like a cat, but he sort of makes a squeaking, croaking sound, so I think he has learned to make himself heard since he no longer has Teaky to meow for him. Sometimes, for very brief moments, Wulfenite has even been known to play with our other two cats. I'll have to write about them sometime - because that is a whole different story.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Moment of Truth - for Management
In the last couple of years management circles have begun to discuss "moments of truth" in relationship to having those difficult conversations that are necessary for process improvement, growth and development. Being able to "handle the truth" (in the fashion of Jack Nichelson's character from the movie "A Few Good Men") is essential to being able to solve problems, put them behind you and move forward.
Knowing that people are becoming more and more familiar with the term "moment of truth", when faced recently with a communication issue that had left hurt feelings within my staff members, and me questioning my own abilities, I requested a moment of truth conversation with my boss.
By specifically using the moment of truth phrase, my boss was alerted to the fact that the conversation might be a difficult one to "handle", but that it would be necessary to resolve a problem or make improvement. He was immediately prepared to not be evasive or defensive, but to listen to the problem and seek solutions.
The isssue to discuss boiled down to a breakdown in communications from the boss's office to my department and staff members. Due to the breakdown, my staff had hurt feelings and a perception that my boss did not trust them or our department. Luckily, due to using the moments of truth phrase to preface raising this issue, our focus was on problem resolution - not on blaming, evading, or covering up. It worked very well and I left the office that evening feeling better than ever about my work and my confidence in not only my job, but my staff. I couldn't wait to talk with the staff members the next day to share the moment of truth experience with them so that they could be a part of developing the solution.
I'd love to hear your comments or experiences in similar situations - let me know at sandra@skysthelimit-hr.com or by comment to this blog.
Knowing that people are becoming more and more familiar with the term "moment of truth", when faced recently with a communication issue that had left hurt feelings within my staff members, and me questioning my own abilities, I requested a moment of truth conversation with my boss.
By specifically using the moment of truth phrase, my boss was alerted to the fact that the conversation might be a difficult one to "handle", but that it would be necessary to resolve a problem or make improvement. He was immediately prepared to not be evasive or defensive, but to listen to the problem and seek solutions.
The isssue to discuss boiled down to a breakdown in communications from the boss's office to my department and staff members. Due to the breakdown, my staff had hurt feelings and a perception that my boss did not trust them or our department. Luckily, due to using the moments of truth phrase to preface raising this issue, our focus was on problem resolution - not on blaming, evading, or covering up. It worked very well and I left the office that evening feeling better than ever about my work and my confidence in not only my job, but my staff. I couldn't wait to talk with the staff members the next day to share the moment of truth experience with them so that they could be a part of developing the solution.
I'd love to hear your comments or experiences in similar situations - let me know at sandra@skysthelimit-hr.com or by comment to this blog.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Regaining Trust
When I accepted a new position a little over two years ago, a few things happened that inadvertantly eroded some trust between me and one of my directly reporting employees. While the management position I now occupied had been vacant, this professional level employee took the position on an interim basis. Additionally, she and the previous manager had gotten along very well and had a personal friendship.
I came in and while we got along well, during the first six months or so on the job I found several compliance issues had been neglected by my predecessor - and presumably by this professional level employee as well. When I asked her about the history of the neglected, yet required programs, she was understandably embarassed not to have been aware of the compliance requirements.
I did not blame her for the shortcomings, because she did not know about them. However, I also took it upon myself to develop and implement the solutions to the problems, without involving this employee. I'm sure she felt marginalized, however I had become so absorbed in the problem-solving and the tasks of putting the new programs in place, that I was thoughtless in not noticing her feelings.
She retreated to lower level functional activities that did not require a lot of judgment, analysis or risk-taking. I encouraged her with my words to take more risks, engage in creative and innovative actions, and my words told her she was empowered to move forward. However, the marginalizing actions of my first year on the job spoke louder to her than my words.
Lately I've been giving some thought to how to regain the trust with this employee and how to once again let her know I believe in her professional judgement and want her to become engaged in the work again. I'd love to hear your words of advice or stories of similar situations and how you were able to repair them and once again provide motivation to your top talent.
Email me at sandra@skysthelimit-hr.com with your thoughts - or simply comment right here!
Cheers,
Sandra
I came in and while we got along well, during the first six months or so on the job I found several compliance issues had been neglected by my predecessor - and presumably by this professional level employee as well. When I asked her about the history of the neglected, yet required programs, she was understandably embarassed not to have been aware of the compliance requirements.
I did not blame her for the shortcomings, because she did not know about them. However, I also took it upon myself to develop and implement the solutions to the problems, without involving this employee. I'm sure she felt marginalized, however I had become so absorbed in the problem-solving and the tasks of putting the new programs in place, that I was thoughtless in not noticing her feelings.
She retreated to lower level functional activities that did not require a lot of judgment, analysis or risk-taking. I encouraged her with my words to take more risks, engage in creative and innovative actions, and my words told her she was empowered to move forward. However, the marginalizing actions of my first year on the job spoke louder to her than my words.
Lately I've been giving some thought to how to regain the trust with this employee and how to once again let her know I believe in her professional judgement and want her to become engaged in the work again. I'd love to hear your words of advice or stories of similar situations and how you were able to repair them and once again provide motivation to your top talent.
Email me at sandra@skysthelimit-hr.com with your thoughts - or simply comment right here!
Cheers,
Sandra
Monday, September 8, 2008
Supervisory Responsibility for Human Resources Management
Okay, I have a question that came up in a course I teach in HR Management for the University of Phoenix. This course is for undergraduate students working on their bachelor's degree in business administration. The question is who is supposed to be managing human resources? Is it the human resources department? Or is it all the supervisors and managers in the organization?
In the broadest sense I spend much of my work day training, coaching, mentoring and guiding first line supervisors in how to deal with human resources issues in their departments. I truly see a Human Resources Department role as supplying the plans, strategies, procedures, tools, resources that managers need in order to do day in and day out Human Resources Management.
In my opionion, the HR Department does not manage the human resources of the organization - they are the providers of the organizational infrastructure used by supervisors and managers. I thought this point was stressed throughout the course in every functional discussion of HRM. Yet, I found that in the very last class when I asked who manages a company's human resources - the response was "The Human Resources Department."
I'm wondering if this means that in asserting our profession over the last 20 or so years, we have allowed supervisors to abdicate their human resources management responsibilities? Or perhaps I've got it all wrong - maybe HR is supposed to be managing the human resources of a company, so that supervisors and managers just need to manage the operational deliverables.
Let me know what you think: www.skysthelimit-hr.com
Cheers,
Sandra
In the broadest sense I spend much of my work day training, coaching, mentoring and guiding first line supervisors in how to deal with human resources issues in their departments. I truly see a Human Resources Department role as supplying the plans, strategies, procedures, tools, resources that managers need in order to do day in and day out Human Resources Management.
In my opionion, the HR Department does not manage the human resources of the organization - they are the providers of the organizational infrastructure used by supervisors and managers. I thought this point was stressed throughout the course in every functional discussion of HRM. Yet, I found that in the very last class when I asked who manages a company's human resources - the response was "The Human Resources Department."
I'm wondering if this means that in asserting our profession over the last 20 or so years, we have allowed supervisors to abdicate their human resources management responsibilities? Or perhaps I've got it all wrong - maybe HR is supposed to be managing the human resources of a company, so that supervisors and managers just need to manage the operational deliverables.
Let me know what you think: www.skysthelimit-hr.com
Cheers,
Sandra
Friday, September 5, 2008
Who Really Manages Human Resources?
My experience as a human resources practitioner for nearly 15 years has led me to a new question. Since the recognition of human resources management as an integral part of an organization's success, is that success tied to a company's Human Resources Department, or is it tied to the front line supervisors who actually manage the day in and day out activities of the companies human capital - the employees?
For next time - I'll explore this question more fully.
Cheers,
Sandra
Sandra Abbey
Sky's The Limit Human Resources Consulting, LLC
http://www.skysthelimit-hr.com/
For next time - I'll explore this question more fully.
Cheers,
Sandra
Sandra Abbey
Sky's The Limit Human Resources Consulting, LLC
http://www.skysthelimit-hr.com/
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